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In traditional intelligence theories when one is asked the question “What makes a person intelligent?” the most common responses will often note a person’s ability to solve problems, utilize logic, and think critically. These typical traits of intelligence are sometimes grouped together under the heading “raw intelligence”. A person’s intelligence, traditionally speaking, is contained in their intellect. In other words, how we each understand, evaluate or respond to external stimuli, regardless as to whether it is a mathematical problem or anticipation of an opponent’s next move in a game, is our collective intelligence. Our intelligence therefore, is our individual, collective ability to act or react in a continually changing environment.

The principal problem in traditional intelligence theories is that they promote “fractured learning”. Many educational reformers have clearly stated that “taking tests merely shows that a student is skilled at taking tests”. At best, traditional tests focus on only about one tenth of an individual’s intellect. Note that Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison, two of history’s most famous examples of brilliant minds, were terrible at taking traditional tests, therefore terrible at “school” in general. Multiple Intelligences theory then, demonstrates that the ability to take traditional tests is almost entirely in the realm of the Logical - Mathematical
intelligence. This intelligence will be detailed later along with the Interpersonal intelligence, which imparts in some students the ability to second guess a teacher’s structuring of a test. Traditional IQ tests predict school performance with considerable accuracy, but they are only an indifferent predictor of performance in a profession after formal schooling.

In an interesting but controversial study conducted during the 1960’s by Biologist Marion Diamond, of the University of California at Berkeley, two sets of rats were raised in different environments; One set had toys to play with, playmates to romp with and a roomy box that was kept clean and fresh. The second set was put in solitary confinement; all alone in a much smaller cage with no toys to enjoy. After several weeks, Diamond measured the size of each rat’s cerebral cortex, the brain area which is responsible for higher nerve functions. The rats in the sociable, clean and stimulating environment grew brains bigger than the rats with the impoverished surroundings. “Does the enriched environment increase the dimensions of the brain, and does the impoverished environment decrease the dimensions of the brain?”, asked Diamond. “The answer, very clearly, is YES.” Similar results were replicated with cats, monkeys and later with humans. So a stimulating, enriched learning environment is crucial to mental development. If we likewise incorporate the varying student intelligences in our teaching activities, our success as well as our students success, will be markedly improved. That each of us possess all the intelligences, that they can each be developed further, that these multiple intelligences work together in a complex manner, and that there are, in fact, many different ways to be “intelligent” are inclusive in a study by Armstrong. Here briefly, in retrospect, are eight of the major intelligences of Howard Gardener’s theory and their relative traits:

Verbal-Linguistic Intelligence:
The capacity to use words effectively, either orally or in writing. It is highly developed in story-tellers, orators, politicians, poets, playwrights, editors, language teachers and journalists. Students with a high degree of this intelligence think in words; learn by listening, reading, and verbalizing. They enjoy writing, like books, records, and tapes, and have a good memory for verse, lyrics, or trivia. Getting into discussions, telling jokes and debating are also characteristics of this intelligence. Maya Angelou is strong in this intelligence.

Visual-Spatial Intelligence:
The ability to perceive the world accurately and to perform transformations upon one’s perceptions. This is highly developed in guides, interior designers, architects, artists, fashion designers and inventors. Students with a high degree of spatial intelligence think in images and pictures, like mazes and jigsaw puzzles. They like to draw and design things, and enjoy films, slides, videos, diagrams, maps, charts. The daydreamers and those who may have strong opinions about such things as colors that go together, textures that are appropriate and pleasing and decorating are included in this intelligence. Pablo Picasso was strong in this intelligence.

Musical - Rhythmic Intelligence: The capacity to perceive, discriminate, transform, and express musical forms is most highly developed in musical performers, music aficionados, and music critics. Students with a high degree of musical intelligence learn through rhythm and melody, play a musical instrument, or May need music to study. They notice nonverbal sounds in the environment: the chirp of a cricket, rain on the roof, varying traffic patterns, and usually learn things more easily if sung, tapped out, or whistled. These people love music and rhythmic patterns and can often reproduce a melody or rhythmic pattern after hearing it only once. Various sounds, tones, and rhythms may have a visible effect on them (that is, you can see a change in facial expressions, body movement, or emotional responses). They enjoy singing and listening to a wide variety of music, and are often quite skilled at mimicking sounds, language accents, and others’ speech patterns, and recognizing different musical instruments in a composition. Paul McCartney is strong in this intelligence.

Logical-Mathematical Intelligence:
The capacity to use numbers effectively and to reason well. This intelligence is highly developed in mathematicians, tax accountants, statisticians, scientists, computer programmers, and logicians. Students with a high degree of this intelligence often reason things out logically and clearly; look for abstract patterns and relationships; frequently like brain teasers, logical puzzles, and strategy games. They also like to use computers and to classify and categorize. These people think conceptually and abstractly and are able to see patterns and relationships that others often miss. They like to experiment, solve puzzles and other problems, ask cosmic questions and think. They love the challenge of complex problems to solve and always have a logical rationale or argument for what they are doing or thinking. Albert Einstein was strong in this intelligence.

Bodily-Kinesthetic Intelligence: Consists of expertise in using one’s whole body to express ideas and feelings, and facility in using ones hands to produce or transform things. A highly developed intelligence in actors, mimes, athletes, dancers, sculptors, mechanics, and surgeons. Students with a high degree of bodily-kinesthetic intelligence process knowledge through bodily sensations; move, twitch, tap, or fidget while sitting in a chair or at a desk and learn by touching, manipulating, and moving. They typically like role playing and creative movement and generally like physical games of all kinds and demonstrating how to do something. They communicate well through body language and other physical gestures. They can often perform a task only after seeing someone else do it. They find it difficult to sit still for a long time and are easily bored if they are not actively involved in what is going on around them. Michael Jordan is strong in this intelligence.

Interpersonal Intelligence:
The ability to perceive and make distinctions in the moods, intentions, motivations, and feelings of other people. This Intelligence can include sensitivity to facial expressions, voice, and gestures, as well as the ability to respond effectively to such cues. Students with a high degree of interpersonal intelligence understand and care about people; like to socialize; learn more easily by relating and cooperating and are good at teaching other students. These people learn through person-to-person interaction. They generally have lots of friends; show a great deal of empathy for other people and understanding of different points of view. They are skilled at drawing others out in a discussion, conflict resolution and mediation when people are in radical
opposition to each other. Mother Teresa and Mahatma Ghandi were strong in this intelligence.

Intra-personal Intelligence:
Self-knowledge and the ability to act adaptively on the basis of that knowledge define this group. This is an intelligence which can include having an accurate picture of one’s strengths and limitations, awareness of one’s moods and motivations, and the capacity for self-discipline. Students with a high degree of this intelligence seem to be self-motivating; need their own quiet space; may march to the beat of a different drummer and tend to learn more easily with independent study, self-paced instruction, individualized projects and games.
These people like to work alone and sometimes shy away from others. They are self-reflective and self-aware and thus tend to be in tune with their inner feelings, values, beliefs, and thinking processes. They are frequently bearers of creative wisdom and insight, are highly intuitive, and are inwardly motivated rather than needing external rewards to keep them going. They are often strong-willed, self-confident, and definite, well-thought-out opinions on almost any issue (although they are sometimes off-the-wall). Other people will often come to them for advice and counsel, but others will sometimes view them as distant or weird. Emily Dickinson and Stephen King are examples of this intelligence.

Naturalist Intelligence:
Environmental knowledge and the ability to identify and categorize plants, animals and nature on the basis of that knowledge. The Naturalist Intelligence can include having an accurate picture of the ambient environment, awareness of the interrelationship of natural elements, and the capacity for self-analysis of these elements. It is found most highly developed in archeologists, animal handlers, animal trainers, veterinarians, biologists, racehorse jockeys, zoologists, environmentalists, wilderness guides and naturalists. Students who have a high degree of the naturalist intelligence seem to be nature-oriented, seek to be outdoors or in the elements and learn more easily with nature-related study and environmental projects and activities. They like to collect items from nature, study them, and group them. They tend to be aware of subtleties in appearance, texture, and sounds that those weaker in this intelligence may not grasp. Charles Darwin, Jacques Cousteau, and John James Audubon were strong in this intelligence.

One of the great promises of Multiple Intelligences theory in education is that it will help us to find individual pathways into and out of our students’ minds. Recent advances in educational psychology and research in applied MI theory offer educators a real possibility of developing the potential of all students. Both educators and students should derive from Gardner’s Multiple Intelligence theory that all people are different and learn differently, and that we should respect, value, and nurture that diversity.

Reference Websites:
Reference website for multiple intelligences links and activities:
http://surfaquarium.com/im.htm

Exploring Multiple Intelligences: New Dimensions of Learning
http://www.multi-intell.com/

Multiple Intelligences Resources
http://www.theatreinmotion.com/resources.htm

Basic MI Theory
http://edweb.gsn.org/edref.mi.th.html

Multiple Intelligence Theory: Principles
http://www.harding.edu/~cbr/midemo/prin.html

Multiple Intelligences: Theory and Practice in the K-12 Class
http://www.indiana.edu/~eric_rec/ieo/bibs/multiple.html

Task Card Overview/Multiple Intelligences
http://www.metronet.com/~bhorizon/teach.htm

Association for the Promotion and Advancement of Science Education activities website - http://discoverlearning.com/forensic/docs/index.html

Naturalist Intelligence - Sea World / Busch Gardens website for students
http://www.seaworld.org/animal_bytes/animal_bytes.html

Prof Larry M. Lynch is a bi-lingual copywriter, expert author and photographer specializing in business and education-related writing in South America. His work has appeared in Transitions Abroad, South American Explorer, Escape From America, Mexico News and Brazil magazines. He teaches at a university in Cali, Colombia. To get original, exclusive articles and content for your newsletter, blog or website contact him at: lynchlarrym@gmail.com. For a free special report of exercises and activities for further developing each of the Multiple Intelligences, e-mail your request to: pentagon_elsb@hotmail.com.

I used to work for the Independent National Newspaper in Canary Wharf, London. I can remember in the build up to Christmas, my department was having a large and expensive new computer system installed because the newspaper was being relaunched, it was when Andrew Marr and Rosie Boycott were becoming joint editors, I digress…. The system was being put in just before Christmas, but it was a massive task, with numerous issues & overruns. As Christmas approached, there were still a number of teething problems, which led to stretched relations between the system supplier and the newspaper staff.

At one meeting about the integration of the system, my director had been trying to get more time investment from the installation company, only to be told that their people weren’t going to be available on Christmas day. My director was frustrated and furious, asking “What are you doing that’s more important than sorting out our system!?” Without hesitating, the guy from the installation company said “Delivering Christmas hampers to the elderly.” The impact was immediate; everyone in the room started laughing & my director joined them, realising that he’d perhaps been a bit unreasonable. Everyone knew that the story about the elderly wasn’t true, but that didn’t matter - the statement had changed his perception of the situation, instantly, & he started behaving more reasonably.

Changing the contextual frame:

There was an advertisement for the Guardian newspaper, which showed a set of still photographs arranged in a particular action sequence. The photographs showed a large framed man with very little hair on his head, wearing jeans and boots, running along a pathway with a real purpose.

In the first frame he is running towards an elderly lady; in the second frame, you see him knock her violently into the street; in the third frame you see him make his escape, obviously and seemingly this is another thug terrorising the elderly.

Then, when you turn the page, you are presented with some wider angle shots. In the wide-angle shots, you see the elderly lady casually walking beside a building that has building works being carried out upon it and where a cement mixer is about to topple from a scaffold. An alert pedestrian notices the situation and heroically runs towards the lady, pushing her clear of the building area. A moment later, the cement mixer falls to the ground in the spot where the lady was standing. The initially perceived ‘thug’ has in fact saved her life.

By changing the frame, the creators of the advertisement had changed the context of the man’s actions. Suddenly, what was perceived as typically criminal then became valiant and altruistic. His actions were transformed in a moment as they were reframed. I am sure you know of many other examples of this.

One of the presuppositions of NLP and something that fascinates and tests me, is that every behaviour is useful or valuable in some context. Upon learning and reading about this in the embryonic days of my learning, I did do my best to do the opposite! I wracked my brains for things that I just could not reframe. Of course, I could not do so for long. It’s just a matter of stretching your brain and finding a context that makes it useful; I have not always found this easy. This process is referred to as context reframing.

Every behaviour is useful in the right context:

Now here is a challenge for you. For any behaviour, no matter how frustrating or apparently without use or value, see if you can find a context where it’s useful. Once you find such a context, a subsequent act of presenting the behaviour in the new context is reframing it. If it was originally a behaviour that was treated very seriously or was problematic, you may then also want to think about adding humour or a playfulness in the way it is re-presented;

Firstly, identify a complaint, either about yourself or someone else, a simple structured to begin with, for example; “I’m too [x].” or “She’s too [y].” (Eg. “I’m too impatient”, “He’s too selfish.”, “She’s too messy.”)

Next up, ask yourself “In what contexts would the characteristic being complained about have value and/or usefulness?”

Thirdly, create several answers to this question, and then craft it into a ‘reframe’.

For example:

“I’m too impatient”

Example answer: “I bet you’re quick-thinking in an emergency.”

“She’s too messy”

Example answer “She’d be good to have around if we were trying to make our home look like it had been burgled.” (I don’t like to be too serious!)

“He’s too selfish”

Example answer: “We’ve had so many problems with people not taking care of themselves, it’s often good to make sure you look after yourself to be in a better position to help others .”

Now, I know these are a bit lame with some of my own tongue in cheek-iness added, but they don’t have to be that useful at this stage; it’s more important that you give yourself the freedom to be creative so your brain gets the pattern of what you’re doing. What’s more, when you have to do that and develop better reframes for yourself, your learning is far more comprehensive than if I were to spoon feed you responses to regurgitate.

The next step is to come up with reframes for any complaints that you (or others) have about yourself. This can be a lot of fun if you do it with someone else. (ie. you say “I’m too [x]” then they generate reframes.)

By the way, the example of “I’m too sexy” as in the 90s Pop Band “Right Said Fred” chart topping hit is not really appropriate

When reframing something someone says, rapport is important (otherwise reframing can seem like a very focused & deliberate attempt to annoy someone.) If you present someone with a reframe, ensure that you have a good level of rapport with them, best start with friends and/or family (assuming that you have rapport with them!)

Fifth, once you get the hang of it, start looking for opportunities to use context reframing each day, starting with the less challenging ones.

In a business context for example, one of the most powerful ways to use reframing is when people have objections (whether you’re selling a product, a service, an idea, or yourself.) reframing is a gentle method of working with someone as opposed to having to sell which many people are uncomfortable with. When you reframe someone’s objection, you can remove or alter its power. I once read the objection “I’m worried - What if I train my staff and then they leave.” The response: “Even worse, what if you don’t train your people and they stay.”

When you discover and create a way to change the context of someone’s objection, it alters the way they perceive it. This has been know to be an extremely effective way to overcome objections entirely.

Finally, for these initial steps of reframing, write a list the objections you get most frequently in business or complaints made in your life and generate a number of context reframes for each one. Then, look forward with a sense of anticipation to the next time someone offers that objection. Please bear in mind that you are opening up options here, not covering things up, if a particular problematic issue is occurring, sometimes it may not be appropriate to just reframe.

Both my Grandparents on my fathers side were 80 two years ago and we had celebratory family gatherings. As I walked into one of the celebrations I asked the standard question “So, what’s it like waking up on your 80th birthday, Grandad?” To which he replied “Better than not waking up on your 80′th birthday”.

Now, I’d like to start playing with ‘content reframing.’ If a footballer kicks the ball into his team’s net, it’s called an “own goal”, but if a soldier accidentally shoots one of his fellow soldiers, it’s called “friendly fire” (Sounds kind of cuddly, doesn’t it? But you would not want any coming your way.) George Orwell’s 1984 had plenty of examples of content reframing (eg. the ministries of peace & truth) that live on today in many forms (a peacekeeper missile, anyone?)

So, content reframing involves changing the meaning of something.

Right, to develop this further, follow this procedure; identify a complaint a complaint or issue with the structure “I feel [X] when [Y] happens.” (Eg. “I feel angry when he does not help” or “I feel frustrated when I make mistakes”)

Next, ask yourself “What else could this (Y) mean?”, “What else could this (X) mean?” or “What else could this situation mean?”, or ask “How can this (X) or (Y) be interpreted?

Then, you can come up with several answers to these, and then create a ‘reframe’.

For example:
“I feel upset when I see the mess these kids have made”

Example answer: “It’s good that they can be ‘in the moment’ without worrying about a few things being out of place.”
Alternate example answer: “A little untidiness is a small price to pay for happy children.”
Another example answer: “The fact that it’s messy means they’re expressing their creativity.”

Obviously, if you were to offer these reframes to someone who is annoyed or frustrated, I would suggest that it would be a good idea to get in rapport with them first and of course to select your words carefully.

As with my previous examples, these aren’t the most amazing reframes in the world, but they don’t have to be that useful at this stage; it’s more important that you give yourself the freedom to be creative so your brain gets the pattern of what you’re doing.

Now, you can come up with reframes for any complaints or issues that you can identify for yourself or others. This can be a lot of fun (honestly!) if you take turns doing it with someone else. (ie. you say “I feel [X] when [Y] happens” then they generate reframes.)

Then, once you get the hang of it, start looking for opportunities to use content reframing each day. For spreading good feelings around and helping people to lessen the easy natural way that they can sometimes get “bogged down” in the trivial. Depends on what you consider trivial though, be careful and thoughtful.

Once again, in a business sense, content reframing is also very powerful for dealing with objections of all sorts. For example, a reframe I sometimes use when someone objects to the price of consulting with me (I am sooooo expensive!) is to respond with something along the lines of:

“If you are after a cheap consultant or therapist, then you are right, I am not for you. If however, you want to invest in your future then maybe I am. If your child needed a serious operation, would you look for the cheapest surgeon? Then why look for the cheapest way to make changes in your life that are important enough to seek help with?”

Again, I do have my tongue planted in my cheek as I write that riposte, however, I am sure you see where I am coming from here.

Then finally, list the objections you get most frequently & generate a number of content reframes for each one. Then, look forward with a sense of anticipation to the next time someone offers that objection. Remember to keep rapport with people when doing this! Or in jargon-free speak, relate, empathise, connect, get on with.

Good luck with your reframing and creating more harmony.

Adam Eason is an author, consultant, trainer and motivational speaker in the fields of hypnosis, NLP, personal development and human potential. His website is filled with information, stimulating articles, resources and unique products. To receive Adam’s amazing bi-monthly ezine, packed with modern, innovative, psychological tips, techniques and information visit www.adam-eason.com You’ll also receive a free instantly downloadable hypnosis session to enjoy at home.

Life is simple. You’d be surprised to know that most of the cherished things in life are almost at arm length and not too expensive either. Yet we tend to think everything needs to be hard, expensive and complicated.

You can be Healthy

Physical health is not about medicine and drugs or even health insurance. It’s basically about a simple diet and an appropriate exercise routine. The ideal diet consists of fruits vegetable and grains. This simple regime guarantees a younger appearance, as well as a longer, and overall better life. If you want to get more technical, here are 8 natural remedies:

Pure air,
Abundant water,
Good nutrition,
Appropriate Exercise,
Enough rest
Not too much, not too little sunlight,

Moderate lifestyle,
Faith.

A good way to remember them is using the acronym: NEW START

Nutrition
Exercise
Water
Sunlight
Temperance (moderate lifestyle)
Air
Rest
Trust

Yes, this is as technical as it gets. The beauty of it all is that a simple lifestyle is often very inexpensive as opposed to its sophisticated counterpart. For more information on simple healthy living read Back to Eden by Jethro Kloss or visit The Master’s Miracle at http://336894.themastersmiracle.com/

You can be Wealthy

Becoming wealthy is not about making complicated investments. It’s simply about doubling pennies consistently.

Did you know that if today you doubled a penny then continue to double the results everyday (0.01, 0.02, 0.04, 0.08, 0.16, 0.32…) for 30 days straight, you would end up with over 5 million dollars? Impossible? Try doing the math yourself on an electronic page. The real challenge is to continue doubling consistently once the amounts keep getting bigger, but once you can do it, you obtain the mathematically correct amount.
There’s a team that got together and created a step by step guide to be downloaded where if you run out of ideas to double your pennies, they give you several highly effective suggestions.

According to the TheMillionaireChallenge team, you can end up rich maybe not in 30 days, but at least before Christmas.

Again, the beauty of it is that you don’t need a huge amount of money to start investing. You can start with a penny. And to download the step-by-step guide will cost you less than ten dollars. And all this time you thought you needed to be a Wall Street genius or have a mini fortune before you could build a real one.

The solution is often in the simple alternatives.

For more information on the doubling method:

Visit http://www.knowledge-download.com/themillionairechallenge/ Also read The Instant Millionaire; A tale of wisdom and wealth by Mark Fisher.

You can be Happy

To put yourself in a happy mood is the least complicated of the three. Most of the times it can boil down to a simple change of posture.
Just to sit up straight, breath properly and open your eyes completely can do the trick. I learned that by imaginary trying to make my ears stretch will automatically make me sit up straight.

Nevertheless, what works magically all the time when it comes to changing ones mood, is to put on a big smile. Even and especially when you don’t feel like it. Because after a while, you won’t be able to help feeling better. Once your physiology changes, your emotions will inevitably follow.
To have enduring joy, however, is a bit more profound though, but to feel better and in a more pleasant present mood is just a matter of emotions. You can definitely control those.

Of course the beauty of this good news is the fact that it’s completely free! I guess the old cliché applies here perfectly: “You cannot buy happiness”.

For more information on this topic read Unlimited Power by Anthony Robbins, Happiness Digest and Mind Character and Personality Vol. 1 & Vol. 2 by Ellen G. White.

So go ahead eat up and get all healthy, double up and get all wealthy, then sit up and feel all happy. It’s yours for the taking in 2005.

I am a missionary working along with my husband in the Caribean.

Sure it sounds easy… “Be happy.” Let’s face it there is a little art and a lot of personal measures you can take to reveal true and lasting happiness. Happiness is not just a series of warm fuzzies. It’s a combination of simple know-how and energetic effort that starts from within.

1. Believe in Yourself. Know who you are. Strive to love yourself for all of your unique, exceptional and distinctive qualities. Embrace your right to be happy! Get in touch with all the small, silly and substantial things that make you smile. They are uniquely yours. You have your own blissful happiness support system deep inside of you.

2. Be Open. Try new stuff. Discover more people, places, ideas and activities that delight and amuse you. There is no end to the supply of wonderful, beautiful, pleasurable, enlightening, tranquil and exhilarating experiences just waiting in the wings to dance with you! Play with the possibilities and be open to finding lots more happiness that’s personally yours… more ideas await you at www.shesite.com.

3. Be Active. Actively seek out happiness and take small actions to sustain you. If you were hungry, you’d seek out food. Until and unless you get up, decide what you want to fulfill your happiness and take action to bring it into your life, your happy hunger won’t be satiated.

4. Be with Others. People are powerful magnets that can help pull you toward your vision for happiness. Find people who share your common loves. Share small happiness miracles and blessings that pop up around you daily. Be thrilled when friends and family members around you feel happy. Celebrate it with them! The more happiness you give the more you will receive. See the infinite possibilities of seeking, sharing and spreading happiness.

5. Be Attentive. Wrap all of the above B’s with a bow of attention! Know each and every feeling, action and reaction that feels good and supports you. Be mindful to add more into your life. The more happiness you are willing to add, the more it compounds and sinks deep into your soul.

Think of your happiness as interest bearing bank account… the more you mindfully collect and deposit, the greater the compounded value. Invest in simple pleasures and redeem priceless returns. Your spot for simple happy essential ideas is waiting for you at www.shesite.com.

Julie Hunt is a female icon and founder of SHE, the foremost inspiration and personal development resource for women who want to live brilliant, happy, successful lives. Marketing consultant, sales expert, copywriting guru, improvisational actress, yoga instructor, author and just plain cool chick… she’s an inspiration to oodles of women who land on her free teleclass series ‘The Essentials.’
Don’t miss out! She’s on a mission to scream, skip, advise and acquaint with women around the globe who want live a vivacious life busting at the seams!

Carole started counseling with me because she was depressed. She had been ill with chronic fatigue syndrome for a long time and believed her depression was due to this. In the course of our work together, she became aware that her depression was actually coming from her negative thinking - Carole was a constant worrier. Many words out of her mouth centered around her concerns that something bad might happen. “What if I never get well?” “What if my husband gets sick?” “What if I run out of money?” (Carole and her husband ran a very successful business and there was no indication that it would not go on being successful). “What if my son gets into drugs?” “What if my kids don’t get into good colleges?” “What if someone breaks into the house?”

Her worry was not only causing her depression, but was also contributing to her illness, if not actually causing it. Her worry caused so much stress in her body that her immune system could not do its job of keeping her well. Yet even the awareness that her worry was causing her depression and possibly even her illness did not stop Carole from worrying. She was addicted to it. She was unconsciously addicted to the sense of control that worry gave her.

I understood this well because I come from a long line of worriers. My grandmother’s whole life was about worrying. She lived with us as I was growing up and I don’t remember ever seeing her without a look of worry on her face. Same with my mother – constant worry. Of course, I picked up on it and also became a worrier. However, unlike my mother and grandmother, who worried daily until the day they died, I decided I didn’t want to live that way. The turning point came for me the day my husband and I were going to the beach and I started to worry that the house would burn down and my children would die. I became so upset from the worry that we had to turn around and come home. I knew then that I had to do something about it.

As I started to examine the cause of worry, I realized that worriers believe that worry will stop bad things from happening. My mother worried her whole life and none of the bad things she worried about ever happened. She concluded that nothing bad happened because she worried! She really believed that she could control things with her worry. My father, however, never worried about anything, and nothing bad ever happened to him either. My mother believed that nothing bad happened to my father because of her worry! She really believed until the day she died (from heart problems that may have been due to her constant worry) that if she stopped worrying, everything would fall apart. My father is still alive at 92, even without her worrying about him!

It is not easy to stop worrying when you have been practicing worrying for most of your life. In order for me to stop worrying, I needed to recognize that the belief that worry has control over outcomes is a complete illusion. I needed to see that, not only is worry a waste of time, but that it can have grave negative consequences on health and well-being. Once I understood this, I was able to notice the stomach clenching that occurred whenever I worried and stop the thought that was causing the stress.

Carole is in the process of learning this. She sees that her worry makes her feel very anxious and depressed. She sees that when she doesn’t worry, she is not nearly as fatigued as when she allows her addiction to worry to take over. She sees that when she stays in the moment rather than projecting into the future, she feels much better. The key for Carole in stopping worrying is in accepting that worry does not give her control.

Giving up the illusion of control that worry gives us not easy for anyone who worries. Yet there is an interesting paradox regarding worry. I have found that when I am in the present moment, I have a much better chance of making choices that support my highest good than when I’m stuck thinking about the future. Rather than giving us control, worry prevents us from being present enough to make loving choices for ourselves and others. Worrying actually ends up giving us less control rather than more!

About The Author

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including “Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: www.innerbonding.com or mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

margaret@innerbonding.com

Ever find yourself stuck in that awful loop of inactivity? You circle around and around between wanting to move forward and then apathy? Covering the same ground and never moving forward? It could be that you are stuck in the web of your own comfort zone. It’s a place we hang out at that’s routine, predicable and safe. We’ve stopped growing, taking risks, and seeking. We can get stuck eating certain foods for comfort, not taking the risk to lose weight, not choosing the next step to overcome an eating disorder, or not getting started at that creative project you already know you would succeed at. The comfort zone offers a safe shelter, a familiar beaten path for us to follow. As long as we stay within the protected shelter, we feel secure and safe in what is already known.

However the cost we pay for allowing ourselves to stay stuck is extremely high. Resisting change and avoiding risks exhausts your life energy. We end up feeling lethargic, energetically drained. Continuing to do the same thing day after day, year after year, can leave us in a motionless rut. Within the comfort zone exists narrow thinking, a lack of creativity, and monotonous actions and reactions. A sense of emptiness prevails as inner dreams and aspirations lie dormant. Our position of inactivity is rationalized with excuses. Then we hammer in our position with the words, “I can’t”. We feel paralyzed by our fears, real or imagined.

MEANING OF STUCK

Stuck implies lying balanced in inertia and fear of the unknown. The longer we wait to choose, the deeper we bury ourselves in future problems. Inaction is created as we put up barriers within ourselves. Internally, we block off emotions and refuse to feel them. We avoid looking at the truth and pretend that everything’s OK. We refuse to acknowledge that there is trouble. We think one way, but feel another.

The most common barrier is not listening to our hearts. When we cut ourselves off emotionally, we sever the connection that allows our love to flow outward. Sometimes this action is necessary, but it always comes at a great price. The price is your creativity, joy, and love. You are cut off from your own heart, or your own life’s purpose.

Being stuck occurs when we are not willing to accept some truth about our self or the situation. Perhaps we are choosing to trade a piece of ourselves to create harmony. Maybe we choose to turn the other cheek regarding unpleasing issues. What are you really feeling? Are you resisting tender feelings because you might be hurt? Are you furious even though you’re smiling? What are you refusing to look at?

ACTIONS THAT ACCOMPANY BEING STUCK

blocking emotions

denying true feelings

stifling a natural response

keeping another at arm’s length

hiding distress

turning a deaf ear

being defensive

maintaining your cool

avoiding the truth

refusing to look at facts

pretending everything’s fine

ignoring the warning signs

closing your eyes to what’s going on

avoiding an unpleasantness

choosing not to know

feeling afraid to act

reaching an impasse

refusing to decide

being unwilling to rock the boat

staying on the fence

QUESTIONS

An important aspect to look at is that there is always a payoff for the action (or non-action) we choose. You are 100% responsible for your own life. Be willing to acknowledge (without self-judgement or criticism) that you alone are keeping yourself stuck. Let go of blaming yourself, your background, parents, partner, friends, education, etc. You can not master what you do not understand. And understanding is incomplete without compassion. If you are stuck, it is important that you ask yourself, “What is my payoff for staying stuck? What am I getting out of it?” Be honest with yourself, even if it hurts. If you can’t figure out what you are getting out of it, ask someone close to you. They may know the answer right away.

* How does staying stuck serve you?

* Do you really want to move forward?

* If so, what are you choosing to be your reason for staying stuck?

* How would moving forward serve you?

* What percent of you is ready to change?

* How supported do you feel about life?

Staying stuck also means that you are not clear about the issues holding you back. Take time to ask yourself what’s really going on. The following are some possibilities:

* I’m afraid.

* I’m overwhelmed.

* I don’t know what step to take first.

* I fear failure.

* I fear success.

* I fear both success and failure.

* There’s no order to what I want to accomplish.

* What’s known seems more comfortable than the unknown.

* I don’t want to deal with this right now.

* I’m too _______________ to handle this.

* I don’t want to let go.

* I’m not sure what invisible force is holding me back.

Copyright 2005, Dr. Annette Colby, all rights reserved.

Dr. Annette Colby, RD
Nutrition Therapist & Master Energy Healer
Annette@AnnetteColby.com
972.985.8750

“Opening Creative Portals to Success”

For free inspirational newsletter, articles & info visit:
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Recently my friend Michelle was concerned about a professional conference she was planning to attend with her husband, a veterinarian. She has no background in veterinary science, so she did not think she would be able to effectively communicate with the people at the conference. I asked her why she thought she had to use technical jargon when she spoke to the other conference attendees. She responded that she wanted them to think well of her. Michelle is a warm, caring individual who is genuinely interested in others. I assured her that she could effectively relate to the people she met by asking them questions about themselves and their businesses instead of trying to impress them with her knowledge of veterinary science.

Many people, especially in business situations, are very concerned about what they say to others. Before an event, they might even think of things to say about themselves so others will perceive them in a positive light. They try to dazzle people with stories about their successes hoping this will impress them. What they may not realize is that most of us are not that interested in the accomplishments of other people. We are, however, very interested in our own achievements and we relish the opportunity to describe them (often in great detail) to anyone who will lend an ear. Unfortunately, we don’t usually get the chance to do so because most people are more interested in talking than listening.

Listening is an under appreciated aspect of communication. When you carefully listen to others, you impress them in ways that talking can never accomplish. You are letting them know you care about them and they appreciate it. How many people have come up to you lately and said, “You’re listening to me too intently. You’re valuing what I say too much. You’re making me feel too good, so stop it now!” I don’t think you’ve had a long line of people with this complaint and I doubt that you ever will. People are starving for the attention that conscious listening can give. These people include prospects, clients, supervisors, co-workers, family and friends.

Most people are so unaccustomed to being listened to that when someone takes the time to do so, they are often amazed. My friend Sandy is a professional coach. She listens carefully to what her clients say about their fears, hopes, and dreams. When she relates back to them what they have just said, they will often respond “How did you know that? You’re so intuitive. You have such great people skills.” They attribute Sandy’s comments to the fact that she must be a tremendously talented coach to be able to know them so well when, in fact, all she did was listen.

The key to being an outstanding communicator is not so much the words of wisdom that come out of your mouth, but how well you listen to the words of wisdom that come out of the mouths of others. As for Michelle, she listened intently to the people that she met at the conference and soon had them eating out of her hand.

About The Author

Della Menechella is a speaker, author, and trainer who inspires people to achieve greater success from the inside out. She is a contributing author to Thriving in the Midst of Change and the author of the videotape The Twelve Commandments of Goal Setting. She can be reached at della@dellamenechella.com. Subscribe to free Peak Performance Pointers e-zine - send blank e-mail to mailto:subscribe@dellamenechella.com.

In my work as a Psychologist and executive consultant I have found that many individuals have difficulty setting limits for themselves. In counseling we often refer to this as setting boundaries. Healthy boundaries are absolutely essential in maintaining good interpersonal relationships. Possessing set boundaries equates to having a clear definition of self which includes who am I, what are my values, what do I stand for, and what is most important to me.

Poorly developed boundaries can make an individual vulnerable to taking on someone else’s priorities. Poor boundaries also lead a person into believing they are responsible for others feelings, thoughts and behaviors. Typically, individuals with poor boundaries are either very controlling or very easily controlled. Visualize an individual with extremely damaged boundaries. They are very often open to being mistreated or manipulated. In the most extreme situations, a lack of boundaries can mean having no way to protect ones self from an unfortunate wide range of abuse by others.

Another way of looking at boundaries is to think of them as being external or internal. Admittedly this division is artificial, yet useful in further understanding your own personal boundaries. I will describe both external and internal boundaries from the perspective of the role they play in a person’s life.

External boundaries allow us to have a clear sense of how close we physically permit ourselves to get to another individual. A person with healthy external boundaries has a sort of radar that automatically communicates to them if they should move more towards or away from certain individuals. People with poorly developed external boundaries leave themselves vulnerable to being physically and/or sexually manipulated or mistreated. Individuals often exhibit their poorly developed external boundaries by rigidly keeping away from others or frequently allowing them to penetrate their own physical boundaries. Some may rapidly fluctuate between these two interpersonal strategies.

Internal boundaries allow a person to contain and protect their values, beliefs, and life priorities. Saying a person has a strong and stable sense of self equates to having well developed internal boundaries, or a clear and comfortable identity. Individuals with healthy internal boundaries take responsibility for their behavior. They are clear about and able to stake claim to what is most important to them.

On the other hand, having poorly developed internal boundaries makes you a prime target to what some have referred to as energy vampires. These energy vampires can drain someone’s energy and exploit them. Having poor boundaries will lead you to say yes when you want to say no and vice versa. Having poor boundaries means living life in a very exhausting, small and narrow manner.

Having clear and healthy boundaries allows you to distance yourself from individuals who are draining to you. Having healthy boundaries allows you to set limits. They also allow you to rise above the approval of other people. Being willing to stand up for what you believe in, even if it is not the “popular” thing.

Developing healthy boundaries is developing your identity. If you are struggling with setting clear boundaries get clear about your values. Ask yourself these big questions and then write out your responses. Reflect on your responses. Ask yourself: What do I value most in life? What do I value most about myself? What do I value most about others? What do I think is the point to life here on earth? Who is my biggest hero and why? What impact do I want to create in the world?

As you reflect on the answers to these questions think about the implications they would have on your behavior, your choices and the type of people you would choose to be around. What changes would you need to make the life you are living now to become consistent with these values?

Remember it is people with clear boundaries and a strong sense of who they are that have the greatest impact in this world. These are the individuals who take appropriate calculated risks rather than staying within a narrow comfort zone. Think of Rosa Parks. Was her decision made from a position of a clear value and a clear limit? As Socrates said, “The unexamined life is not worth living”. Examine your life. Get clear about who you are and what you stand for. Have the courage to stand up for your convictions. In the words of Gandhi, “Be the change you want to see in the world”. That requires clear boundaries, and a willingness to pay the price to become the valued person you deserve to be for the absolute most important person – Yourself.

Sincerely,

Dr. Mike Davison
http://www.PartnersInPurpose.com
http://www.PartnersInPurpose.Blogspot.com

If you have any questions about individualized consultation or
coaching to help you live your big dream, please do not hesitate
to contact me at mike@PartnersInPurpose.com .

Copyright, 2006. http://www.PartnersInPurpose.com
All rights reserved. For more information, contact:
Dr. Mike Davison
3295 N. Arlington Heights Rd. Suite 103
Arlington Heights, IL 60004
Telephone: (800) 470-3257
mike@PartnersInPurpose.com

This is not an episode of Star Trek but one of my favourite techniques for a) generating results b) getting a reaction from colleagues. It is is one of a series in which random stimuli are used and alternative viewpoints are adopted. It works best with well defined problems or where new products or services are being considered.

To start, define the problem or situation as best you can and brief those who are taking part. A group of half a dozen or so is ideal.

Imagine that an alien spaceship has landed on earth and the aliens are looking at your problem or the object that you have described. Next try to imagine what sort of questions the aliens would be asking, what would they be curious about? Many of the checklist techniques can provide some guidance here. A possible list could be:

• What is the purpose of this?
• How does it work?
• Why does it have to be this way?
• Why do these earthlings use these materials?
• Is it useful to me?
• Why does this matter, and to whom?
• Is it worth any money?
• Is there any other value?
• Could it be used for …..?

These (and other questions) should be asked with childlike innocence i.e. assume no familiarity with earthly concepts.

The questions may throw up some ideas which indicate that the original starting point was flawed. If this is the case then revisit the problem definition stage of the creative problem solving process. If some common themes emerge then record these and use them as random stimuli for further excursions or use a form of association to group some of themes to see if they suggest further options, choices or ideas.

One of the specific aspects of creative thinking is the DO IT technique method outlined by Robert W Olsen in his book ‘The Art of Creative Thinking’. It is an efficient method for defining problems and finding effective and creative solutions. This method helps you to draw the best out of the creativity techniques.

DO IT is essentially an acronym for D – Define Problem; O – Opening your mind and applying creative techniques; I – Identifying best possible solutions; T – Transforming them into concrete actions.

D - To define the problem accurately, you will have look at the problem in its entirety. You have to get at the root of the problem so you know that you are dealing with the causative factors, and not with the symptoms. If the problem is large or big, you could break them into smaller and meaningful components so the problem assumes greater clarity and widest dimension. Include the constraints contained in each aspect of the problem so you cover the problems in their fullest range. Summarizing the problem will help in getting at the crux of the problem clearly.

O – Once the problems areas are identified, you could begin finding solutions by looking at them from all angles. Brainstorming is invariably an effective method for coming out with solutions. Ideally, you could use group brainstorming, where effective thinkers and implementers could be included to present their solutions to the problem. It is important that even the most ridiculous and the weird are given full expression and accepted without any criticism or questioning. It is often found that the most abnormal and wildest of ideas generally lead to most creative solutions. So suppressing them or negating them will deny scope from creative inputs.

I – Identifying the best solutions for the problem or problems on hand involves the next step. Often the best solution may turn out to be costly or may have limitations, not immediately apparent to you. You have to go the whole length and explore the solutions to weigh how far they could be effective. You could see whether the solutions fall within the overall goals of the organization or your own. This will determine the extent to which you can go for giving shape to the solutions looking from the future perspective.

T – This is the final stage of transforming the creative solution into a reality. It involves not just the creation of product or services, but also about taking care of the marketing and business aspects of the creative plan. This is one area where more creative thinkers falter because they fail to ensure its commercial and economic viability. It is crucial an Action Plan is set for transformation of the creative solution that includes business and marketing plans. You have to sincerely try all avenues unmindful of hurdles or rejections that you may encounter to actualize them. As always perseverance pays.

The common and conventional method for using the DO IT technique is the usual linear method of listing. If you were instead, to use Mind Maps, you will realize you have an excellent tool on hand. Mind Mapping allows you to record all the problems and solutions easily and concisely, and renders the whole exercise meaningful and simple. When a complete Mind Map is formed using the DO IT technique, you gain a full picture, which provides the necessary association and links between different elements of your creative process and solution. These are completely absent in the regular listing type method.

By using Mind Maps you can register all the brainstorming ideas quickly as they arise and analyze how they can be connected to alleviating the problems. Because the big picture of the entire creative process is mapped on, it becomes easy to assess the impact and gauge its full impact to come out with the most creative solutions. Association and concepts are crucial elements to creativity and Mind Maps provide the greatest scope that is not available in any other method; hence the superiority of the Mind Mapping method. They make for simple and yet highly powerful technique. As in everything else, you have to try Mind Mapping technique to understand its significance and dynamism. Time you used Mind Mapping to see for yourself.

About the Author:

Dr. Vj Mariaraj is a Mind Map enthusiast and has been using Mind Maps for the past twelve years. He has created over 5650 Mind Maps. To learn more about mind mapping send an email to freemindmap@aweber.com . He is the founder of BusinessBookMindMap.com that creates Mind Map Summaries of Business Books. To learn more visit http://BusinessBookMindMap.com/mind-map.php?ea24